Throwing the catnip in...

Donny

I don't seem to do anything right. My Sammie doesn't understand I just want to be all lovey and kitty with her. She has her moments where she lets me near her and noses me.  Then, without notice she has her moments where she lashes out and paws me and chases me into corners. This morning I was sitting in my favorite chair and she snuck up on me and windmilled me.
I didn't do anything. Why Dog, why?
 I almost don't want to cuddle with her for fear she will change her mind, mid purr.  I hear her eating my food and playing with my toys in the middle of the night. Why alone??? I'm the best cat in the world. Dad tells me all the time I am.
How do I move on from her? I need to have a conversation with Dad and see if maybe she can go away. This is too painful to continue.
Did I mention she eats my food in the middle of the night? That's just not right.
I do like her littler box though.
Maybe I can chat with her.  Wait here, I'll be right back....

Sammie

This place is mine.
 I have worn him down.
 I have trained them both to cower in fear.
Warden is my bitch.
I scream for food. He responds.
 I scream for litter change.  He jumps.
I boldly chew with my mouth open with eating stupids food so they can hear. They can do nothing about it.
He yells, scolds, but I scurry away like a good inmate, knowing he is an idiot and will return as soon as his back is turned.
This morning I put Stupid in the grovel position and I didn't even have to touch him. Warden watched in horror. Tonight I walked up to warden in the food room and looked up at him then began eating Stupid's food in front of him. He pointed me to go away.  I stopped and walked away, knowing I made my point.
Next will be to take over the top floor and force them to leave permanently. I'm tired of sharing.
Oh crap, Stupid has come to get yet another beat down. I'll be just a moment...